Greetings from the Empty Nest

A chipmunk in my garden contemplating the end of summer.

Well, we did it. My ex-husband and I successfully launched our last and final child into her collegiate era. She’s happy. We are happy (separately, not together). And in the quiet of early September and the Labor Day holiday, I take stock of my situation. I actually have a busy month ahead, but I refuse to deal with business until the weekend is over. So I clean out random drawers. And cook. Cook like a maniac. I’m like a chipmunk stocking up for the winter ahead.

The problem with being a gardener — a food gardener — is that I have to deal with what I’ve grown. I already have a freezer full of sour cherries, black raspberries, tomato sauce, pesto, green beans, and other things that freeze well—including half of my 20-pound watermelon. Today was apple sauce-making day. While I was dropping Lucia off at college, my daughter and granddaughter picked three giant bowls of apples for me. So today I made sauce. I like to freeze them in single-serving jars to eat with yogurt, or as a freezer treat. It took me three hours to cut and peel all the apples (I left the good peels on some of them). It’s the kind of work that allows time for thinking. I think important thoughts like “Why the hell do I do this? I could just go to the store and buy apple sauce for a fraction of the effort. Who is going to eat all this food now that I don’t have kids to feed?” But who am I kidding? I can’t help myself. In fact, at the same time I made apple sauce today (no sugar or spices added), I also made healthy muffins to eat and freeze. Then I made an early dinner of three sisters’ rice, a recipe I copied from Sly Fox Den Too in Rhode Island. It’s an indigenous restaurant worth a visit. It’s got squash (from my garden), fresh corn from an organic farm stand (also in Rhode Island) a can of beans, and white rice with a bit of organic chicken bullion mixed in. I froze the extras of that too, because I just know one day this fall or winter I’m going to be starving and won’t feel like making anything.

Apples ready to pick.

When I finally sat down on my couch to put my feet up and rest, I noticed a chipmunk sitting pensively on the top of my stone Japanese lantern, as if savoring the last days of summer. I laughed to myself. It was exactly how I was feeling. The cool air sent a gentle breeze to bend the Mugwort and Sea Oats that had finally gotten their way in my flower beds. It was too late to care or attempt to change things. But the Snapdragons from Bubbly Hills Farm are in their second year of full-season blooming and that astounds me. This is the time of year when I start to think about what to do differently next summer. I always plant too much and plant my vegetables too close together. But next summer is far off and plans can wait. Right now I just want to sit and enjoy this moment — a full freezer, kids off on their own adventures, happy memories from a ridiculously crazy summer (in a good way), and a wide-open horizon of possibilities ahead.

Tomorrow I will answer all the emails and make the list for the next few weeks. Tomorrow I will start to figure out what comes next. Tomorrow I will get back to the regular business of living.

Tonight, I’m going to finish putting the apple sauce in jars, put the muffins in the freezer, and take a dip in my (newish) hot tub. Then I’m going to curl up in bed and finish the great book I’m reading, Travels With Charley, by John Steinbeck. In true Trail of Books* fashion, it was recommended by a friend recently. Steinbeck’s travels begin with him taking the ferries from Sag Harbor to Shelter Island, then from Shelter Island to Greenport, and then the ferry from Orient Point to New London, Connecticut. Which, as it happens, was the exact route I took on my travels with Lucia to college. Life is filled with magic, for which I am incredibly grateful.

*I write about the magic of the Trail of Books in Love Nature Magic, which comes out in paperback this week. If you haven’t read it yet, what are you actually doing with your life? If you have read it, please leave an Amazon review. Thanks!