The “old chapel” of the Moravians, was built in 1751. My sister Heidi died. She was a very private person, so this post is not about her, or her loving children and adorable grandchild. Her life is their story to tell, or not tell, not mine. “What is it about December?” a dear family friend asked me. My brother died of AIDS on December 23rd, 1985. My mother died on December 19th, 2009. And now my sister, another December death.
Maria- I am so sorry for the loss of your sister, and brother, and father in the months of December. I took care of your brother as my patient at LVH. I will never forget that I refused to “gown up” to spend time with him and hold his hand. I don’t know if you knew that. Losing parents is expected as life goes on, but losing siblings reminds us of our own mortality.
This is the moment I started to cry reading this: "Consider that every child might be the baby Jesus, whether born in Palestine or Pennsylvania. And consider the true spirit of Christmas, which is that the light of God is inside each of us. . ."
I have a lump in my throat as I read this. I will listen to the music and let the tears roll. Sibling loss hurts so much. Yes, all that you said. Especially: reminding us to be present now and what will be in 100 years....
May December pass.... and your tears flow freely to mark the losses.
PS. I'm so sorry to hear about Heidi's passing. She was so kind and supportive of me throughout my time at Rodale and cycling. It's so sad. I hope the good memories you have of time spent together carry you through the holidays. 💔
I am so sorry for the loss of your sister, Maria. And here you are reaching out to all of us! This is beautiful and filled with light and song - much needed in December. ❤️🙏
I am so sorry about the loss of your dear sister. And for all of the losses you had in December. Thanks for sharing from your heart. It helps others so much. I am alone at Xmas now and your article really hit home for me. I lost my mother when she was 66 and my father and my son 6 years ago. I am divorced and am blessed to be surrounded by many friends.....but nothing can take place of family completely. There is something about having that connection. Regardless- thank you Maria for sharing and my heart goes out to you this holiday.
As always, you eloquently conjure all the emotions. I’m so sorry for your loss - new and previous. And, I truly appreciate how you share. I hope writing is as healing as singing for you. xo
First, and most of all, I am so sorry for your loss...and the losses you have had through the years. I lost my father on December 16th, 2000. That same year, Faith Hill released a Christmas song "Where Are You Christmas" which really hit home for me. It is sad but hopeful. I actually look forward to hearing it every year now so I can cry and smile about my dad and my mom (who passed in 2022). To paraphrase C.S. Lewis (from the movie Shadowlands) "...The pain now is part of the happiness then. That's the deal."
You’re such a talented writer, Maria! Thank you for sharing, & I’m so sorry for your recent loss of your sister. I hope days ahead get easier, & that y’all spend the holidays remembering the funny things your deceased relatives did.
Yes, this. All of it.😔😢💔 I'm a terrible sap too. The beauty of candlelight, incense and melodic voices is almost too much to bear. And there's no greater way to stay in the moment than leaning into a song and belt it out. It's magic. ❤️
Maria- I am so sorry for the loss of your sister, and brother, and father in the months of December. I took care of your brother as my patient at LVH. I will never forget that I refused to “gown up” to spend time with him and hold his hand. I don’t know if you knew that. Losing parents is expected as life goes on, but losing siblings reminds us of our own mortality.
Peace and love to you.
This is the moment I started to cry reading this: "Consider that every child might be the baby Jesus, whether born in Palestine or Pennsylvania. And consider the true spirit of Christmas, which is that the light of God is inside each of us. . ."
Thank you Maria for writing this.
I have a lump in my throat as I read this. I will listen to the music and let the tears roll. Sibling loss hurts so much. Yes, all that you said. Especially: reminding us to be present now and what will be in 100 years....
May December pass.... and your tears flow freely to mark the losses.
PS. I'm so sorry to hear about Heidi's passing. She was so kind and supportive of me throughout my time at Rodale and cycling. It's so sad. I hope the good memories you have of time spent together carry you through the holidays. 💔
I am so sorry for the loss of your sister, Maria. And here you are reaching out to all of us! This is beautiful and filled with light and song - much needed in December. ❤️🙏
I am so sorry about the loss of your dear sister. And for all of the losses you had in December. Thanks for sharing from your heart. It helps others so much. I am alone at Xmas now and your article really hit home for me. I lost my mother when she was 66 and my father and my son 6 years ago. I am divorced and am blessed to be surrounded by many friends.....but nothing can take place of family completely. There is something about having that connection. Regardless- thank you Maria for sharing and my heart goes out to you this holiday.
As always, you eloquently conjure all the emotions. I’m so sorry for your loss - new and previous. And, I truly appreciate how you share. I hope writing is as healing as singing for you. xo
Beautiful Maria. Thank you.
First, and most of all, I am so sorry for your loss...and the losses you have had through the years. I lost my father on December 16th, 2000. That same year, Faith Hill released a Christmas song "Where Are You Christmas" which really hit home for me. It is sad but hopeful. I actually look forward to hearing it every year now so I can cry and smile about my dad and my mom (who passed in 2022). To paraphrase C.S. Lewis (from the movie Shadowlands) "...The pain now is part of the happiness then. That's the deal."
You are a strong woman Maria. May your Light continue to shine bright in darkness and in light.
Heartbreaking and beautiful, Maria. Sending hugs and wishes for a peaceful holiday.
You’re such a talented writer, Maria! Thank you for sharing, & I’m so sorry for your recent loss of your sister. I hope days ahead get easier, & that y’all spend the holidays remembering the funny things your deceased relatives did.
I’ll share your blog posting friends, too😀
Yes, this. All of it.😔😢💔 I'm a terrible sap too. The beauty of candlelight, incense and melodic voices is almost too much to bear. And there's no greater way to stay in the moment than leaning into a song and belt it out. It's magic. ❤️
“In essentials, unity; in nonessentials, liberty; and in all things, love.”
😭❤️