The Really Real Reasons Why I Had a Stroke

5 months later: The top 5 reasons

A view from my favorite beach town at sunset…

As many of you know, on February 17th, 2023 I had a stroke. In the early aftermath, I speculated as to why I might have had it when I listed 25 reasons why I thought it had happened. Since then I’ve seen a cardiologist and worn a heart monitor for a month. I’ve been through physical therapy. I’ve had neurology appointments. I had a sleep study done. I had a session with Lisa the shaman. I’ve had blood work. And I’ve done a lot of research. Here are my top 5 real reasons:

1. Mugwort was right — I did have a sleep problem. I have sleep apnea, which puts me at very high risk for both high blood pressure and stroke. I now have a CPAP machine I’ve named Ricky. We are best friends and sleep together every night. The good news is I no longer snore. The bad news is I need to take distilled water with me whenever I travel with Ricky. I’m OK with that.

2. I did have high blood pressure. From stress. From diet. From sleep apnea. From not being active enough. From not setting boundaries with people. I now take blood pressure medicine and it’s not that big a deal. It’s under control for now. I practice setting boundaries every day. I say no a lot more often. I’ve let go of some people that raised my stress level unnecessarily. I try not to work on the weekends or after dinner unless I totally feel like it. I go with the flow a lot more.

3. While better than many, my diet was still too high in salt, fat and sugar. Yes, I am on a low dose of statins. But combined with that and changing my diet I got my cholesterol from 237 down to 142. I now pay attention to those numbers. I avoid sugar as much as possible unless it’s fruit or a dash of maple syrup. I rarely eat red meat unless it’s Bison or Venison. I am still gluten free. And I’ve cut down on my butter consumption dramatically. I add as many beans and veg to everything I can. It’s actually awesome and not only do I feel better but I have all sorts of new recipes to try. It’s kind of fun, actually. My mini food processor is my new best friend…after Ricky, of course.

4. I needed to move more. Now, I see a personal trainer once a week. He’s awesome and keeps me motivated (Hi Connor!). I walk and take the steps whenever possible. I go to the gym on my own. I swim laps. I’ve played two whole games of golf! I do little exercises wherever and whenever I can. Sometimes I do yoga. The main thing is that I prioritize movement. Fortunately, my heart is fine, even “strong,” my cardiologist said. Whew! That takes some stress off the table. And my first mammogram in 5 years came back totally benign. Double Whew! (One whew for each of my ever-loving boobs.)

5. From the shamanic perspective, it was a push that I needed to pay attention to and focus on what was really important. Nothing like a brush with death to scare the bejeezus out of you and make you glad to be alive. At 61, I’m simplifying my life a bit. Updating my will. Rethinking my finances. Thinking more about how I really want to spend my time, and with whom. And of course, committing to my path of love, helping others where I can, but also helping myself too. And…HAVING FUN! And I now know having fun means traveling to beaches, going to concerts (I’ve got tickets to see The National and Boy Genius!), seeing movies, playing golf (Gasp! Who knew?), growing and eating the stuff in my garden and giving the extras away. Hanging out with people I love and enjoy. Laughing. Learning new things. Taking photos and documenting my life. And lastly, letting my landscape go a bit wild and crazy. I now, like Mary Reynolds, think of myself as a guardian of nature, rather than a gardener.

The shadow of that stroke will always be with me. I am 99% recovered now (and have one more month to get to 100% before the window of recovery closes.) But I am happy and grateful. In many ways, I am stronger and healthier than I was before. I’m also grateful to all of you who have reached out, wished me well, or asked me how I’m doing. It matters. It means a lot! Thank you!

My primary care doc, my cardiologist, and my neurologist have all signed off on my progress and will see me next year (with just a cholesterol blood test in the middle to check that it stays low while lowering the dose of the statin.) I am now free to live a normal life and go about my business. But, when you are 60 plus, you know that the future is limited — whether it’s a day or a few more decades. Not to sound corny, but I am in the sunset years of my life and want to make the most of them. Every day matters. My life is truly now a before the stroke and after, and the after is precious and better than I ever thought it would be, filled with the sort of everyday magic that if I put it in a novel, people would think I’m being ridiculous (I can’t even tell you the half of it). I find myself tearing up a lot with the beauty and magic of it all. But that magic starts in my heart — sharing love, reaching out to people with genuine gratitude and care, and thanking everything and everyone and all the beings in the universe. Life is too precious (and short) to waste it on resentments or fear or stupid shit. Let it go. Focus on what really matters: Love.

Love + Nature = Magic